Embracing Lovely Rhythms: Creating a Home Filled with Peace and Joy
Hey Lovely!
In today’s All Things Lovely Blog, we delve deeper into the how of crafting lovely rhythms in our homes.
In our last blog, we discussed the importance of creating a rhythm that makes you feel lovely. We discussed our "why". Today, we'll focus on actionable steps to establish those rhythms. But before we dive in, I want to go ahead and tell you five of the books I used to help me personally create more peace in my life through healthy habits, rhythms and routines.- The Lazy Genius by Kendra Adachi
- The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg
- Grace, Not Perfection by Emily Ley
- The Artisan Soul by Erwin Raphael McManus
- Atomic Habits by James Clear
Living in a small apartment with my husband, I wanted everything to be perfect. I craved to live in a perfect home that flowed nicely and started on the right foot. I wanted grace to be my foundation, but somehow I went from that to having a 20-step morning routine and a detailed cleaning schedule with 15 things on it that I needed to do daily. You guessed it, I was left exhausted and frustrated. Poor Nathan, ever supportive, was confused by my constant changes and tears. He had no idea how to help me because I was constantly changing systems on him. Looking back, I wish I could tell my younger self to embrace organic, lovely rhythms instead of forcing perfection.
A routine is like a staircase. Before you get to your destination you have to climb up every stair and there's not a lot of flexibility. Where as a rhythm is like a walk in nature – it's flexible and focused on the end goal, and you can choose to either take the same route again, or you can choose a different route all together. At the end of the walk though, you end up at your destination. The Lazy Genius beautifully describes routines as on-ramps to our day, not destinations themselves. A lovely home rhythm, therefore, focuses on creating moments that simply make you feel lovely.
To craft a lovely rhythm, ask yourself what matters to you, as well as what you desire to be your outcome. Work backwards from there to figure out what your possible map could be for your rhythm. For example, if reading by lamplight at night after dinner feels lovely to you, craft habits that get you to that destination. The habits don't have to be the same each time. Ask yourself what will make you feel the most lovely in that moment, and practice those things. If you realize that you'll feel even more lovely if you listen to the song of the dishwasher washing your dinner plates while reading by the lamp, then quickly load up your dishwasher! If having a tidy living room matters to you more, then tidy for ten and then read! What healthy habits do you crave to have? You are capable of achieving them and a great way to do that is to name your "cravings" So that you can choose to do the things that get you to that reward.
Habits are key to maintaining lovely home rhythms. James Clear's Atomic Habits introduces a four-step model: Cue, Craving, Response, and Reward. Let's apply this to our reading example:
- Cue: The sun setting / night time has arrived
- Craving: The desire to end the day feeling as lovely as the sunset by reading a book by lamplight.
- Response: You ask the question "What will honestly make me feel the most lovely while read my book?" And you realize that also listening to the dishwasher sing while you read matters on that particular night.
- Reward: Reading your favorite book by lamplight with a smile on your face as you also listen to the dishwasher.
Write down the Lovely Home Rhythm you want to start practicing, and apply these 4 steps! The routine itself could change every day, but the rhythm, the destination can stay the same.
Every day, you have the power to look at your home through lovely eyes. You have the power to choose what matters the most to you and your home. And whatever that may be, you are capable of achieving it in a way that is organic and not forced. Because if you want it, if you crave it, through healthy rhythms, you can have it.
It is so important for us to grasp as homemakers that we are designing a home. Yes, we get to choose what it looks like, but we also get to design how it feels mentally, physically, and spiritually. We get to design how it smells. We are the artist of our homes. So why would we not want to paint a lovely picture with it?
I love this quote from the artist in soul, which by the way, if you haven't read this book, you definitely should give it a shot. Erwin writes, "to create is to be human. To create is to fulfill our divine intention. To create is to reflect on the image of God. To create is an act of worship." Then he goes on to say a page later, "we will never create anything more powerful or significant than our lives. The complexity is that we are both works of art and artists at work.
How beautiful is that?
Your life is the most beautiful piece of art you can create,and your home is where your life lives. You are an artist, not only creating a beautiful piece of art in yourself, but in your home too. Please, please, please do not believe the lie that we often believe that says that our homes are not lovely.
my friend. Just because Sally is thriving because of her routines doesn't mean you'll thrive off of her routines too. She is thriving because she chose routines that she knew would make her and her personal home thrive. Not because she copied and pasted them from a blog post she saw on Pinterest, printed it out, and stuck on her fridge. We live in an instant answer world where we expect fast results with needing to do little work. But if you want a home like Sally, you need to look at your own home and desire rhythms that feel lovely and make you thrive. Don’t fall into the trap of trying to copy others' routines. Your home should be uniquely yours.
Continue to look for little lovely moments in everything. When your toddler asks for the hundredth time while you're trying to work, "Watch mom!!" and then continues to just throw a ball in the air, how can you make that a lovely moment? When your not-so-little-now baby is transitioning to a new bed and is constantly trying to break out of his or her room instead of nap? How can you make that a lovely moment? When your husband is playing a video game or watching a show after a long day of work instead of spilling out how his day was to you, how can you make that a lovely moment? Your entire day is full of opportunities to choose peace instead of negative thoughts. You have the power to choose which path you will go down. You just have to move slow enough to notice them.
So here's a sprinkle of biblical wisdom that should encourage you in the days to come. Romans 12:2 "Be transformed by the renewal of your mind." You know what that means? It means that it's possible. It is possible to renew your mind. It is possible to get out of that constant loop of speaking negative to yourself and transition into noticing lovely things and thinking lovely thoughts, and seeing through lovely eyes.
So yes, it's possible. Romans 12 verse 2 shows that it's possible by saying, "Be transformed by the renewal of your mind."
Be transformed. You can, with the help from our Heavenly Father.
Thank you for joining me today. Remember, you are lovely, and so is your home. Until next time!Please feel free to send this blog to someone who may need it! Become accountability partners with them as you both walk a lovely walk together down a path that leads you two to more peace and less guilt in your mind, life and home.
I hope this blog has encouraged and inspired you to embrace rhythms in your home. Remember, your home is lovely, and you are lovely. Notice the lovely moments, write them down, and revisit them whenever you need a boost.
If you enjoyed this blog and want to learn more about creating peace and joy in your home, check out the Lovely Home Planner by All Things Lovely Co. It’s designed to help you cultivate healthy rhythms and routines tailored to your life.
Lovely Home Planner: A six-month undated planner and guided journal designed to help women find peace and organization in their homes. Check it out at allthingslovely.co or on Instagram @allthingslovely.co.
Be Sure to Tune in and Check Out What's New on the Podcast!
This podcast IS available on ALL Podcast streaming platforms!
Your home is lovely, and so are you. Notice the lovely moments and cherish them. Have a wonderful day!
- Evelyn